Bad Cop
by VarCapel
Summary: Old habits die hard much to the chagrin of Judy and the ZPD. Nick is an apathetic sarcastic cop who routinely finds himself on the edge of being let go, only to pull the brakes just before the hammer gets dropped on him. It's an outrageous take on what happens when you take a street fox and put him in uniform.
1. Close Shave

8/06/2018: Bad Cop is just an idea I had to make very short stories to practice humor and parody. I also wanted to use it as a way to practice being concise and to exercise my writing. Stories don't come regularly and updates are rare. But every now and then i get a small burst of motivation to do something and come to this series to play and experiment. After three stories, I put it on the shelf for a long time. And now I have started updating again. There are two newer stories that will be added soon. Both shorter than the others but I enjoyed these. The new stories are

The Flaming Fox (I had this idea for a while since I first started the series. Finally got to creating it!)

and Sick (Very short but humorous.)

* * *

 **Close Shave**

Nick waited for his order at Paco's Grill, a restaurant in downtown Sahara Square. He tuned out the cheerful banter of officers around him and sipped a coffee. Their lunch break had just begun. He turned an eye toward Judy as she waited in line. His eyes wandered down to her plump butt and short cotton tail, provoking a response in his pants that he resisted by remaining motionless in his seat. Judy impatiently bounced on her toes standing eighth in line. Paco employee's reorganized the crowded line as it stretched from the counter to the entrance. Nick rolled his eyes and pushed his mug of coffee away. It was going to be a short break.

The routine was beginning to make Nick grumpy. Officers got an hour break. They usually spend half of it waiting for food. The third quarter is spent getting comfortable and eating. And the remaining fifteen minutes are used up by officers preparing to go back to work.

Finally, his food arrived. Nick continued to stare at the adorable Judy. She was now third in line. Nick jumped in his seat, pulled from his voyeurism by the vibrating in his pocket. He glanced at his phone.

"Finnick?" Nick answered the call.

"Nick! I need you, buddy. I got into some trouble with Big and uh, I mentioned you." Nick slapped the table in disbelief.

"Why pray tell, did you mention me, old buddy?" he asked with forced tactfulness.

"Nevermind that! Get your red-tailed blue-blood butt over here and save your best friend!"

"Where are you?" Nick asked with faint concern.

"I'm at Big's place in Tundratown." Nick sighed.

"I'm working, you troublemaker. But I'll see how I can help." Nick hung up, not wanting to hear another word from Finnick. He looked at Judy. She wasn't going to be easy to convince and expected an earful later. Nick stood up and walked up to Judy. He placed a paw on her shoulder.

"Sweetie," he said, cautiously.

"Hmm? What's up? I'm almost up to order." Judy looked up at him curiously. He knew when she could tell he was lying, so he took extra care in his next words.

"Something came up and I need to take a little trip right now."

"In the middle of our shift?" she asked with a hint of disbelief. Nick sighed and said,

"Yeah, my belly is acting up and I would prefer to keep my uniform looking blue and not brown. Ya got me?" He threw her a smile, glad that he came up with the excuse.  
She inhaled a deep sympathetic breath,

"Aye. Alright, just be careful, Red. Let me know how you're feeling later?"

"Thanks, Fluff." he speedily left the diner, putting on a funny walk to drive the lie home.

With the veil of a lie pulled over Judy and the expectation that she would cover for him on his shift, Nick felt free to race to Tundratown to catch up with Finnick and learn more about this trouble he had gotten into. Once he boarded the train heading to Tundratown, Nick took a moment to call Finnick. He tapped a foot as he clung to a standing strap, waiting for him to answer. After five rings, the phone clicked.

"Meh, so he made contact with you, Nicky?" said Big. Nick went wide-eyed as he said,

"Oh, yes sir. But I am at a disadvantage here."

"Good." Big interrupted. "The advantage should be mine anyway. I'm tired of Finnick's dishonesty and poor performance. He's disrespectful. And out of a fondness for you, I've allowed him to call you in for a last-second chance to make things right. But if you fail, Finnick will face consequences." Big hung up on Nick, leaving him mortified. He growled in frustration, scaring a family of pandas that sat next to him on the train.

"I'm so glad I don't have to deal with these goons on a daily basis," Nick said aloud, ignoring the stares. He forgot he was still in his cop uniform and quickly returned to a more professional demeanor.

* * *

Finnick paced back and forth under the guard of Big's polar bears.

"What? You guys going to watch me scratch my butt too?" he sneered. The bears did not react. "Like a pair of rugs, you two. Lighten up!" Finnick said. A knock on the door set his ears standing to attention. Big rocked in his chair, held by his best guard. When the knock was heard, the guard opened the door. Finnick peeked around the bear to see Nick shivering and shaking off the snow on his muzzle.

"Hello, fine gentlegoon." He chuckled nervously and brushed snow off his shoulder. "I'm here for-" the guard pulled him inside violently by the collar of his uniform. "Impatient brute," he grumbled. The bear turned to face Nick and revealed Big sitting on his paw. Nick greeted Big in the traditional way, kissing the tiny adorned hand offered to him. He fantasized about biting it off.

"Let me explain the situation, Nicky," Big began. "A month ago, Finnick made a promise to produce a profit for me through selling clothing and other general goods that I had given him for free. He failed to sell and produce the profit promised me. He then tried to lie about making any money whatsoever and was avoiding me for several days." Big stood up from his seat. He walked to the tips of his bear's motionless fingers and stared at Nick. "I'm tired of his failures and dishonesty, Nicky. If you can survive a bet, I will grant Finnick a three-week extension for his debt."

"And if I fail?" Nick asked warily. He could hear Finnick whimpering behind him from deeper in the house.

"if you lose, Finnick will be shaved completely naked and paraded across Zootopia. He will be exposed as an untrustworthy hustler. His reputation will be tarnished to the point of him being unable to make any friends in our..." Big searched for an oblique allusion to describe the illegal trading of undeclared and ill-gotten commerce, "private established business." Nick sighed with contempt.

"Fine, I accept. But what exactly will I have to do?" Big thought for a moment. He stared at Nick's uniform and said,

"You're going to have to remove that offensive outfit." He gestured to the police uniform. "I want you to stand in the coldest part of Tundratown for ten minutes naked. If you fail to last ten minutes, Finnick will be punished. If you succeed, Finnick will be granted the extension." Nick's jaw dropped. The coldest part of Tundratown would hit -20'C on any given day. He could freeze his paws to the point of hospitalization in as little as two minutes in that weather, especially standing in the snow.

"But this is impossible," Nick protested. Big scowled.

"Then let us go tell your friend how big of a failure you are. And you can be the one to inform him of his punishment." Nick anxiously glanced at Finnick.

"Wait!" Nick wiped his face before resting his hands on his hips, defeated. "I'll try it," he said, panting with the heat of nervousness.

"Marvelous." The guard carrying Big walked to the next room where Finnick was being kept. Nick followed them.

"Nick! Hey buddy. I'm sorry about this."

"Not as sorry as I'm going to be," Nick replied.

"You can't lose Nick. They're nuts." Finnick pleaded.

"Well, at least you won't be freezing yours," said Big. "Nicky is going to have to stand in the freezing tundra naked for ten minutes. If he can last this punishment, you will have another shot at paying me what you owe. If he loses, you will be shaved and paraded around Zootopia as a warning to others, not to cross Big." Finnick grumbled.

"When do we start, and where are we going?" Nick asked.

"North to the border wall that separates the Tundra from the Sahara. It's a short drive. And everyone will be going." Big turned toward the kitchen and clapped his hands.  
"Manchas!"

"Yes, sir?" The jaguar appeared from around the corner, peeking his head out of the kitchen.  
"Are you done cleaning yet? We're going to be taking a little trip with our guests here. Get the car warmed up."

"Yes, sir." Manchas bowed then left to prepare their vehicle.

Nick and Finnick were kept apart by the polar bear wedged between them in the car. They could see fierce winds licking up the snow and lashing at the car windows.

"Crap," Finnick muttered. A fine reaction to compliment the dread running through Nick's mind. Nick was trying to figure out how he was going to protect himself while standing like an idiot naked in the tundra. The car suddenly stopped.

"Get to it Nicky," Big commanded. A twisted smile formed on his lips, revealing needle thin fangs. Nick silently took off his clothes, took a deep anxious breath and barely opened the door before the wind stole the door from his weak grasp and hit the passengers with a wall of snow.

"Aww, I'm not even out of the car," pouted Nick. The bears' shoulders shook with a rare chuckle. He took the first painful step outside, letting his bare paws touch the iced snow of the tundra. "Nope. Not going to work." He danced and jumped and hopped as best he could, curling up on his paws while hugging his tail for warmth. He held his hands in prayer and squeezed them between his thighs. The bears, who barely seem to make any facial expressions, grinned with amusement at the distressed fox.

"it's only been forty seconds!" Finnick Shouted, as he anxiously kept an eye on the clock. Easy for Finnick to say. His paws weren't stinging from the pain like he was standing on knives. His snout wasn't drying up. Nick's ears screamed with the agony of a crippling, burning cold. When the stinging cold started giving way to numbness, and the energy began to fade from Nick, he submitted to the violent tundra and dashed back into the car.  
Big stopped his watch and sighed,

"Meh. You lasted two minutes. Let's get you losers back inside. You will have to watch Finnick be shaved." Nick lowered his aching ears in defeat, unable to look at Finnick who sneered at him and gave him a side eye.

"Thanks, buddy," Finnick said.

"Whatever," Nick mumbled. If Finnick just quit this stupid life, he wouldn't be getting into such trouble.  
 _Why couldn't he try honest work for a change?_

Finnick shouted and cursed defiantly at the guards after the shaving. They held him for three more days and paraded him through several public streets across the districts of Zootopia. All of Big's acquaintances and connections were sure to see the spectacle. Finnick was a message: If you make a deal with Big, you better deliver.

* * *

Nick lied in the bath with one arm hanging over the edge of the tub. He sighed content as he breathed in the steamy water. The only disturbing thoughts he had were of his failure to protect Finnick from career suicide. The severity of what Finnick experienced was not lost to Nick. Finnick was lucky to escape with his life. But without a means to support himself and with no reputation, it was not a life worth living. Judy called through the door,

"Your phone."

"I'll be out soon," he replied. Nick sat up and stared at the ripples and soap bubbles concealing his lower half. "I bet it was Finnick." Nick unplugged the tub and slowly stood up straight, careful to not spill water out of the tub. He let the drain swallow the bath water and slowly stretched. As relaxing as the bath was, there was bound to be more trouble with the fennec and his thoughts wouldn't let him relax.

The smell of food snaked its way into the bathroom. "Oh, yes." Judy had been cooking. He quickly brushed his wet fur then used the special hairdryer bolted to the wall. It was a flat rectangular machine that whirred and gently blew warm air from its vent. He stretched his legs and arms, turning and bending to expose harder to reach areas for drying. The warm air tickled underneath his tail. When he was satisfied, he shut it off then dressed. He met Judy outside of the bathroom standing with her arms crossed, rapidly thumping a foot, glaring at him.

"Um, hey." Nick smiled.

"You want to tell me why Finnick was desperately calling you for help just a moment ago?" Nick froze,

"Uh, no?"

"What is going on?" Judy asked sternly.

"I don't know, yet. I haven't spoken to him." Judy sighed with a little relief.

"Well, if there is anything I can do to help, don't leave me in the dark. And don't let him get you into trouble. When I came back from work the day you left, I saw you shivering and looking ill. You don't need his stress."  
Nick smiled. He adored her care, her love.

"I'll try, sweetheart." If only she knew that he was shivering that night because he was engaging in a stupid dare to help Finnick. His phone rang again. Nick picked it up and smiled when he saw the picture above Finnick's name. He and Nick were wearing matching costumes. They dressed like cheesy breadsticks. Nick was a full breadstick, but Finnick dressed like a half-eaten one with fake cheese dripping over the top. Nick excused himself by holding up a finger as he took the call. Judy shrugged and took her freshly served dinner to the bedroom. Grateful for the privacy, Nick snuck out of the apartment.

"Hey, buddy," Nick said in a gentle voice.

"Um, hi," Finnick replied. There was an awkward silence. "Damn it, Nick. I'm sorry for this crap. Listen, I got nothing. Zero. All my belongings were taken by Big. They wrecked my car. I got no equipment, van or money. Big took what he wanted and destroyed everything else and left me in the dirt. I got nowhere to go. No clothes and I'm not going to grow my fur back for another two weeks at least. All I have are these stupid pj's."

"Say no more," Nick said. "Meet me outside, and I'll help you get some clothes and a room to stay in."

"I'm a piece of trash, Nick," Finnick replied. "Why do you continue to help me?" Nick listened to Finnick sniffling over the phone. He sighed, wondering this himself. Nick wondered if it would be easier if he wasn't so compassionate.

"You're my buddy. I'm not going to let you down that easily. And, I am still the one who lost that bet. Just come downtown to the neighborhood and we'll go shopping together. I'll get you hooked up."

"I'm already in the area," Finnick replied and hung up.  
Judy opened the front door and stood with a puzzled expression.

"Hey, not having dinner? Where are you off to now?" Nick bit his lip. Was she eavesdropping?

"Uh, sorry. I have to take care of something," he said.

"Sweet Cheese and Crackers..." Judy shook her head.

"Alright, I won't be asking any more questions. When you're ready to let me know everything, I'll be here." She sighed.

"I love y-"

"Yeah, yeah." Judy interrupted, then closed the door on him.

"Goodbye," whispered Nick. He lowered his head in shame.

Nick Spotted Finnick a block away from his apartment. He gingerly approached Nick, still stinging from humiliation. Nick grit his teeth as he fought back a smile when he saw the hideous sight. Finnick was bald. His bright pink skin practically glowed under the streetlights. Nick could see the wrinkles and folds of Finnick's skin. The lack of fur made his eyes more prominent and bug-like. His ears looked like bat wings. Add to that the coconut printed pajamas he wore, and he was comically hideous. The pj's were used for one of his old scams.

"Well, um..."

"Shut it, Nick!" Nick jumped back.

"Whoa! Alright." He draped an arm over Finnick's shoulders. They walked around the city together looking for any clothing shops that have not yet closed for the night.

"Finnick I'm going to have to tell Judy, like it or not."

"Damn," he muttered. 'I don't need her going all ZPD on me. I don't need the extra attention right now."

"She is zeroing in on me and really applying pressure. You know I cave when she gets upset." Nick said.

"You love her too much you big wuss," Finnick grumbled.

"I know," he sighed. The two found a shop that could accommodate Finnick's size, but the selection was pricey. After mulling over his options, Nick pushed his budget up a bit to help Finnick. He bought large sunglasses to help mask his face. He covered his head with a wide hat and wore a plain set of red long-johns and a scarf. After the purchase, Nick checked his wallet and shook his head. He didn't have enough to help Finnick find a room for the night. And Nick wouldn't allow Finnick to dump his burden on anyone else. Nor did he trust anyone else to properly help Finnick. It was time to give in to the lack of options. "Finnick. You're coming over to our place for the night. And you can call me all the ugly names you want and complain. But you got nowhere to go, buddy."

"Oh for the love of..." Finnick tugged on his ears. "I'm going to get it good with bunny cop upstairs." He crossed his arms. Nick pat him on the head.

"Relax. You'll be okay. You know we're the best people you could end up with right now."

"Only so long as this stays between us," pleaded Finnick.

"I will talk to her. Just come with me already before I drag you by those dish plates you call ears."

"Do that, and I'll bite your tail," Finnick replied with a grin. Nick laughed,

"Yikes."

As they approached the apartment, Nick grabbed his key then froze. He sighed,

"Here we are..." Nick nervously stared at the key. Finnick looked at him with mild annoyance.

"Well?"

Nick dropped his readied arm and said, "Wait here for a bit," He slowly worked up the courage to finally open the door. He walked in and noticed she left his dinner in a container on the table. It was almost 11 P.M. He sneaked into their room and saw Judy had fallen asleep. Nick exhaled, "Oh boy." He walked towards her as if he was approaching a crime scene.

"Hey, Judy." Nick gently shook her. She blinked and looked at him, still maintaining that frown he saw when he left the house.

"I'm sorry. For all of it. But there was some trouble," he said.

Judy sat up and rubbed her eyes. She folded her paws in her lap.

"Alright, Foxy. Let's hear it."

"I lied when I left the restaurant. I wasn't ill. I used that as an excuse to leave my shift so I could help Finnick get out of a bad spot. I didn't know what to expect when I got to Big's place. It ended up with me losing a bet that caused Finnick to lose even bigger. He is right outside our door with nowhere to go and no belongings. I just bought him clothing with half of my last paycheck."

Judy smiled in disbelief. She tugged on her ears, "Oh, you foxes!" she lied back on the bed and huffed. "You're a cop. What the hell were you thinking? Bring him inside. You foxes are unbelievable."

Nick allowed Finnick in. He dropped his bag of new clothes down near the door and looked around.

"Not that bad," he said.

"Judy will let you stay," Nick said.

"Finnick, you suck!" She shouted from the other room.

"I know," he replied sourly. Nick used a large basket to prepare a bed for Finnick in their living room.

Judy approached them and said, "We have to go to work tomorrow, Nick. But when we get back, we're going to put a stop to this dirty dealing nonsense. We're cops. I need you to pull your weight on this."

"And how do we make Big go away?" Nick asked.

"Big is only part of this problem. I'm talking about your friend. He needs to clean up his act. And why is he dressed like that?"

"Guys!" Finnick cried out. "Isn't it enough humiliation that I had the worst week of my life? Do I need to see my moron friends fight over me too?" He jumped into his bed and curled up in a blanket, trying to hide from the shame.

Judy huffed and stood with her arms on her hips. She spoke to the shaking lump under the blanket.

"Whatever. Look, tomorrow your days as a professional street hustler are over Finnick."

"As Judy says it, it shall be done," Nick pretended to wave a wand. Judy frowned his way. "He won't be able to last on the streets anyway given what happened. Nobody will deal with him now." Nick looked at Finnick. He peeked his head out from under the blanket, keeping his ears concealed and still wearing the sunglasses. "Tomorrow you will be joining us upstanding citizens."

"You guys are too much," said Finnick, lightly smiling.

"Oh, you must be starved," Nick said. "Here.

Have my dinner."

Nick gave him the container of food left for him by Judy.

Finnick would stay with Nick and Judy for another month before lucking out and getting a place. They continued to support him until he managed to get a loan to start up his own small business called 'Finnick's Fabrics'. He sells sheets, clothing and other threads and fabrics.


	2. Fowl Games

**Foul games**

"Alright," Judy sighed with her hands on her hips. She was half dressed for work and Nick was still in bed. "Get up!" she said impatiently. Nick turned around and mumbled,

"I am awake."

"We're going to be late. Or rather, you will be late. I'll leave without you." Nick sat up and rubbed his eyes. Grogginess pulled down on his shoulders. His eyelids struggled to lift themselves. Judy sighed,

"Well, it's a start. But your third leg is doing a better job of rising than you are." She gestured to his erection under the blanket.

"Right," Nick said, giving her a half smile as he lied back. He leaned against the wall on his bed. Judy rolled her eyes and smiled. So easy. All he had to do was make her laugh. He wiggled his hips, making his penis dance under the blanket.  
"Come on..." Nick teased. Judy stuck her arm under the blanket and with the softest touch, made him squirm.

"Ooh!" Nick shivered and squirmed. He giggled as she massaged his penis. He tensed, forcing it along because of his late awakening. It wasn't long before the rumbling in his groin caused him to arch back and splash her paw with cum.

"Phew." Nick panted satisfied. He watched as Judy wiggled her paw full of his sperm. Then he recoiled when, with a loud splat, she smeared it on his muzzle.

"Aww!" He hunched his shoulders and shut his eyes trying to bury his head in his body in protest. When she was done, he opened his eyes. Judy always found a way to turn things around on him. He shrugged.

"At least it's mine." Nick licked off what he could reach from his muzzle. Judy did the same with her paw.

"Now get out of bed," she commanded.

"Yes, boss." Nick hopped out of bed. He yawned and shakily walked to the bathroom to freshen up, enjoying the glow of his orgasm.

Nick and Judy arrived at the ZPD ten minutes late. Nick expected to be greeted by Chief Bogo, annoyed by the interruption of their late arrival. But he wasn't in the bullpen.

"It looks like Buffalo butt is late."

"Lucky us," mumbled Judy. The officers began isolated conversations with their neighbors as they waited. When Bogo was heard hurriedly walking to the briefing room, they slowly quieted down.

"Sorry for the delay," Bogo said as he was halfway through the door.

"Now, I'll keep this short. It's just a normal day." He ran through the list of duties for the officers. When he arrived at Nick's name he said,

"Nick, I need you to infiltrate an illegal fight club involving chickens, pigs, and weasels. Our initial probe has reported back to me confirming the location of the suspected activities. You might be familiar with some of the ringleaders. If you can get friendly with them and get inside, you are to report all activity taking place in the suspected fight club."

The Chief paused for a response. Nick only offered him a smile and a nod of understanding.

"You will be riding with officer Oats." Bogo pointed to an otter. He sat near the window next to a giraffe. Oats turned his head to Nick.

"We'll camp out at West Cafe, partner," said Oats.

"You got it," Nick replied.

"Be sure to change your outfits to something more casual. Though your old contacts know you are now a cop, it would be best if both you and Oats dressed looking like civilians. They do not know Oats is an officer," said Bogo.

"Roger."

"Now, Judy will lead the SWAT team that will raid the fight club once Nick has provided us with pictures of the suspected ringleaders in action. We want hard evidence." Bogo thumped his podium.

"Now for officers..." The Chief continued to brief the remaining officers of their duties for the day. Judy waved at Nick as she left with SWAT saying,

"We'll be waiting for you."

"I think I have an idea of who I'm going to get reacquainted with," Nick said. He waved off Judy then turned to his partner, Oats. The otter was standing next to Nick waiting to be acknowledged. Nick crossed his arms confidently and said,

"It shouldn't be too difficult."

Nick and Oats separated momentarily to change into inconspicuous clothing. Along the way, he thought about the possible mammals of interest being investigated. If Bogo wanted him on this case, then it must mean that someone in his past was involved. The only person he could think of was Anthony.

The aardvark was a fan of physical contact sports. And he had a penchant for gambling. Nick got so lost in thought that he walked past his apartment and had to turn around. He shook his head and chided himself. When he finally got dressed, he saw he was going to be late to meet Oats.

"So, the curse of the day is to be late to everything." Nick hurried out of the house. They met up three blocks north of the police station. Oats smiled confidently then asked, "Do you think you know these guys, Nick?"

"If one of them is who I think it is, yes. I might have sold some pawpsicles and buckets of ice to members of the fight club at one time. They used the ice buckets to cool down the swelling from the bruises their fighters earned in the ring." Officer Oats shook his head in disapproval.

"Hey, that was a while ago," Nick said, annoyed. "I haven't had contact with these guys in almost three years. Way before I became a cop. A customer was a customer. I sold to anyone. Didn't mean I was a part of what they did. I had my own thing going on."

"Alright," Oats said, waving off the conversation. It was always an agitation for Nick to have to put up with the biases other cops expressed through their body language. The other officers behaved as if they were all squeaky clean.

It was especially a wonder to Nick why his former hustler friends never shied away from him even though he now wore a cop uniform. It was as if they didn't think he respected his job and still treated him as one of them. Sometimes, he wondered if his antics in uniform when no one was watching, helped support the illusion that he was still a street fox.

In truth, Nick just wasn't sure how to behave as an officer. He barely passed his exams and was accepted with the lowest possible passing grade. He often mimicked his partner's behavior to ensure that he was doing his job right. But when it counted the most, somehow, Nick pulled through when it mattered the most. It helped that he was so good natured and a soft speaker. It was easy for him to de-escalate tense situations with his charm.

* * *

Oats and Nick waited at the Cafe for their contact. Nick learned that Officer Oats was the one who first initiated the probe and worked with another partner that discovered the location of the hideout.

A voice called from the cafe doorway,

"Oh, hey! Nick!" A sheep cheerily jogged to the two.

"So," the sheep spoke softly, "you're interested in the fisticuff festivities too?"

"Well, I'll be. Good to see you, Paul." Right away, Nick shook hands with the familiar sheep. Oats looked at Nick with some surprise. He tilted his head slightly enough that Nick caught it. He'll deal with the otter later.

"Yes, I heard some cool stuff about this spot," said Nick.

"Oh, the old swine would be happy to see you too," Paul said. Perfect. The sheep seemed ready to reveal information.

"So you and Swine-face huh?"

"Yep. Hey, we'll be starting tonight at seven. I'll see you there and let them know you're coming."

"You do that, Paul." Nick smiled. Paul shook Nick and Oats hands as he went to order waffles to go.

Oats waited for the sheep to leave the cafe before commenting,

"You handled that so naturally."

"Yeah, I'm pretty slick."

"I almost believed you were in on it myself," he remarked.

"I can blend in with the worst of them if it helps me do my job." Though Nick hid the small twinge of annoyance by the remark behind a smile, his hard tone betrayed his true feelings.

"Sorry, I didn't mean any offense." Nick nodded. Oats was a smart cop and knew how to read through most peoples defenses. His ability to detect when someone was nervous made him a valuable officer in undercover work. If they spent more time together, Oats was sure to ease up on Nick. But the fox was sensitive. And he knew it too. Being with Judy taught him this.

Still, Oats was exceptional in what he did. He could alert his partners if someone was getting too jumpy, helping to guide fellow officers through tense moments when they needed to extract information from nervous criminals with loose lips.

Hoping to ease the awkwardness, Oats spoke, "So, Paul arrived as we hoped and gave us the start time. The rest is on us to get inside and mingle." Nick pulled out his phone, adding,

"And this little computer will be snapping pictures on mute all the while." He grinned. Everything seemed to be going as they had hoped. Maybe just this once, Nick got an easy job.

Foul Games 2 of 3

Oats guided Nick to their destination. They approached a large parking lot with half-closed gates and caution tape placed out front. The lot was masked to look closed off for repairs. Standing next to a tan brick house was Paul. He waved to them from the other end of the lot. The windows were barred and painted over. Standing beside Paul was an aardvark.

The plainclothes officers approached them.

"Great. You are here. We're starting in ten minutes," said Paul with a smile.

"We need to confiscate your phones. There is a no phone policy in this house."

Crap, Nick thought. So much for an easy job. The officers turned in their phones after shutting them off.

"Come on in!" He led them up a small flight of stairs into the house. Their phones were placed in a chest next to the entrance and locked inside. He then introduced them to the silent anteater.

"Nick, Oats, this good fellow here is Anthony. He owns this lot and helps us keep things on the hush-hush."

Good info so far. Now all Nick needed to do was find a way to get some pictures and text the names of the ringleaders to Judy and SWAT.

In the main room were half a dozen weasels and squirrels playing a drinking

game. They stood along a couch and dining table they had set up and were trading shots of a spiced mint drink. The game being played was "weasels versus squirrels". The person that flinched after taking a punch to the arm had to take a shot. They paid no mind to the Nick and the Oats as Paul led them down to the basement. They walked down a narrow wooden spiral staircase. In the center of the basement was a square pit made using wooden boards. The wooden walls stood two feet high and enclosed the structure with only a skinny staircase leading in and out.

"Here is the pit!" Anthony said. All the while, Nick took mental notes of what he was seeing.

"Nice setup you got here, Ant," Nick said

"Don't call me Ant," he replied in jest. Walking through the entrance of the pit was a mean-looking chicken. She had wraps around her feet and tiny rubber nibs over her claws. She strutted around impatiently, waiting for her fight to start.

"Easy, Peppermint," Paul said. We'll be ready in five more minutes.

"Good," she replied aggressively. Nick smirked at the chicken. She looked at Oats and said, "You should get in here little otter. You're just slightly taller than me. I'm sure it would be a fun scrap!"

"Maybe some other time," he chuckled.

"Figures. Newbies never want to have a go with me."

"You're one tough fowl, Peppermint," Anthony said.

"Don't you forget it." She clicked her beak at the anteater playfully.

"Hey, where is Swine-face?" Nick asked.

"Oh, he'll be here later. He's out getting more food actually."

A silent group of potential fighters sat in the room waiting to start: four roosters and chickens, two badgers, even an arctic fox, and cheetah. The cheetah and fox sat beside each other silently on a long orange couch.

"Well?" A rooster began, "Are we ready?" Paul looked at his watch and smiled,

"Alright, it's showtime!"

"Yes!" Peppermint jumped excitedly. Nick dragged his eyes around the room then said, "I'll have a go," and jumped into the pit.

"What?" Peppermint looked at him in surprise. "Hey, no fair. You're three times my size at least! And you need to guard those claws, dirty fox." She crossed her wings in disapproval.

Nick laughed and said, "I'm just kidding you chicken." He jumped out of the pit to the laughter of the group. Not looking to be upstaged by a fox, Peppermint chased after him.

"Oh, you think you're so cute. I'll peck you up and down for that." More laughter exploded as she chased Nick, who seemed more intent on enjoying himself than doing his job. Oats watched as Nick continued to distract the crowd. He almost forgot to leap on the opportunity himself because of the natural spontaneity of Nick's engagement. Oats ran upstairs and shouted out to the weasels and squirrels in the living room,

"Hey! A fox is getting a beat down by a chicken! Come see! Peppermint is going crazy!"

"Oh yeah!" the group of squirrels and weasels cackled and rushed on down, nearly trampling Oats as they ran by.

That worked really well! He thought. Oats sneaked over to the chest in the now empty living room. He could hear crashing and jeers down below. It was getting noisier by the minute. Oats reached into his pants, where he always carried a secret police issued lockpick stitched inside. He began working on the chest.

Downstairs, Nick was guarding himself against Peppermint, who went from an angry chase to playful stomping on his head, still wearing her mitts.

"You'll be my dinner one day chicken! I swear it!" Nick said in an exaggerated villainous tone.

"Alright, you vermin!" Anthony shouted. "Let's have some order I say! Order. We got some good action coming. Peppermint, your opponent is ready. And since it just got more crowded down here, let's give the crowd and the fighters the entertainment we're all here for!"

Nick leaned on Paul, laughing. The sheep looked at him and said,

"Good show already and we haven't even had a real punch thrown yet." Nick yelped suddenly when Peppermint snuck a peck at his ankles from behind then ran to the pit.

"Got ya, you vulpine vagina!"

Peppermint's opponent quickly flew into the ring and tackled her while she remained distracted. Paul put up his list of fighters, stapling a sheet to the wall next to the pit. The winner would have their name checked off, and they would advance to the second set of rounds. The top fighter of the night would receive a monetary prize.

Nick needed to find the location of the illegal tender to be handed out. He needed to get pics of the names of the participants. But in order to do any of this, he needed to retrieve his phone.

* * *

Oats stopped fiddling with the lock to take a deep breath. He peeked out the window and noticed a pig entering the lot from across the yard.

"Damn..." He tried the lock again and...

click.

"Yes!" He opened up the chest, quickly grabbed his and Nick's phone, then locked the chest again. He darted for the basement as soon as he heard the front door rattling.

The noise was more focused now. Cheers and groans of surprise indicated the crowd was responding to a fight. Oats turned on the phones in the middle of the staircase, hidden by the wall. He hurried over to Nick.

"Are you enjoying yourself?" Oats asked.

"Oh, right. What are we going to do?"

"I got our phones back," he said, trying to not talk at normal volume, but the noise in the basement was drowning out his voice. He discreetly handed Nick his phone.

"Good job, partner!"

Nick slipped his phone into his shirt and walked around the room. He kept a close eye on the second match as it progressed and looked around at items of interest to snap pics of. He fiddled with his shirt, operating his phone from behind the fabric, keeping it concealed. Through the shirt he took several pictures:

He took one of the lists of fighters, making sure to get a clear picture of the names. He took a silent picture of the pit with fighters in action. He snapped a picture of Anthony and Paul. Nick approached Paul when he noticed Swine-face coming down the stairs.

"Oh, there he is," Nick said, pointing to the stairs. Paul looked in the direction of Nick's finger,

"Hey Swine-face, welcome back!" Paul said.

"Hey. Food is all ready to go. And the funds are in the car waiting for tonight's champ," he said.

"Wonderful" Paul replied. "Hey, guess who showed up?"

"Who?"

"I did! Hey buddy, it's been quite a long while huh?" Nick swiftly made his way over to the surprised pig.

"Heh. Here I was thinking you were too good for us, Nick! Give me hug! Paul told me you were around." They embraced like long lost friends. Swine-face looked at Nick.

"Wow, You look different. What happened to you these few years?"

"Oh, lots pal. Lots." There was a brief silence between them, but it was enough time for Nick to ask,

"Oh hey, I'm curious, what is the prize amount? Can you give me a number? Maybe even let me dish out the reward? I'll make a good show of it." Nick winked. The pig shook his head.

"You always were a clown, Nick." Swine-face laughed. "Why don't we sit together a bit, hmm? Catch up." Nick looked at Oats. The otter nervously watched the second match as it was coming to an end. He glanced at Nick and frowned. Worry dressed his eyes.

"Sure. Can I use the bathroom first?" Nick looked at Oats, they locked eyes briefly.

"Sure, just head on up," the pig said.

Officer Oats approached Swine-face just as the match ended,

"Wow, that was interesting. I've never been here before. But I'm glad I came."

"This one brought Nick over," Paul said, pointing to the otter.

"Yeah, listen, I'm feeling a little ill so I'm thinking of running to the store for a second to get me some water and meds for my stomach."

"Huh, okay otter. But hurry back. There is plenty of more action. And thanks for inviting Nick. It's always good to see him. The kindest guy I know."

"Definitely. Just give me twenty minutes." Oats hurried upstairs after Nick.

Nick waited near the bathroom door. When Oats spotted him, he hurried over and whispered, "Come on, did you get anything?"

"Yes. I'm sending you and Judy the pics now."

"Awesome." Oats smiled. "I want to get out as quickly as possible. We got what we needed. Let's not get in too deep." Oats watched his phone beep with Nick's message.

"Alright, sending Judy the go-ahead for SWAT now," Nick said.

"Perfect, I'll head outside. Or rather, we." Nick paused for a moment. He listened to the loud crowd downstairs and resisted a smile. Oats saw him hesitate and said,

"Oh, Nick you can't be serious."

"Sorry, I'm going to stay for a bit longer."

"This isn't going to look good when SWAT shows up," Oats warned.

"What? I did my job. I want to see what happens next. Maybe I'll have more interesting stuff to send you guys."

Officer Oats sighed and said, "Fine. Just be careful."

"Thanks." Nick jogged back downstairs after glancing at his phone. Judy replied,

"ETA 15 minutes!" Nick stuffed the phone back in his shirt. He sat down next to Swine-face and Anthony.

"So Nick, I wanted to ask have you ever been in a fight like this?" Anthony gestured to the pit. Nick shook his head,

"No, though I don't mind watching. I prefer to fight with my wits."

"Quite like you, Nick," the pig said. "I've never seen you ever act violently toward anyone. But that doesn't make you any less dangerous." Nick looked at the pig suspiciously. "Heh, you're a good liar I mean." He winked at the fox. "You have to be with the way you used to hustle. I bet you could sell war to a pacifist. Or in your case, pacifism to a war-monger." Nick resisted the prickling of his fur. Was Swine-face onto him?

"If the price offered was high enough," Nick forced a smile.

"The slime that oozes off of you is remarkable, Nick."

"I guess," he mumbled and turned his attention to the ring.

The arctic fox stood opposite the cheetah in the fourth round. Their fists were raised. They observed and studied

each other before deciding on a course of action. The crowd of squirrels and weasels made a drumming noise that boomed off the walls of the basement. The cheetah struck first relying on his speed to land a hit. He caught the fox by surprise and threw several punches after feeling encouraged by the success of his first strike. The fox put up a guard and waited out the flurry. When the cheetah expended his energy, the fox charged in, forcing his taller opponent into a defensive stance. Despite his height, the cat was slimmer and lighter. He had no stamina. The fox noticed how quickly the cheetah drained his energy and took advantage by launching slow, heavy blows using his knees. Each heavy hit left the cheetah winded despite being blocked. The cheetah retaliated out of desperation with a headbutt that sent the fox reeling back and left him with a bloody nose.

"This is getting good!" said Swine-face. Nick watched impatiently as he waited for SWAT. Suddenly, there was a loud bang and a flash. Smoke began to fill the room.

They're here! Nick quickly moved to one corner of the room, trying to avoid the crowd. There was only one exit, and that was by going up the spiral stairs. The stairs were now blocked by officer McHorn in SWAT gear. The rhinoceros used his massive size to shrink their exit.

Nick watched from the corner of the basement, behind the pit as the confused audience panicked. All he had to do was wait.

"What gives?" Anthony shouted.

"Cops!" A weasel yelled. The room quieted down as Fangmeyer gave orders.

"Nobody move. One by one, come up with your arms high." The animals were forced to walk past the rhino that continued to obstruct the opening of their exit, forcing them to go one a time. As they trickled through, they were apprehended by officers as they came.

"How?" Swine-face froze, not moving from his seat. He turned to notice Nick was not sitting next to him. The smoke had blocked his view of Nick as the room was shrouded in fog.

"You alright? Nick?" The pig called.

"I'm sorry about this," Nick said softly.

"You? Why?"

"I'm doing my job," Nick said, a hint of guilt in his voice.

"This is what you do now? Lie to your friends?" The pig said.

Anthony looked at Swine-face as the officer waited for them to come up. He shook his head and walked up the stairs, accepting arrest.

"This is an illegal event," said Nick. "No medical team, no license, illegal gambling with state-owned money."

"Now you're all law and order is that it? You are poison, Nick. Everything you say is a lie and you betray everyone around you."

McHorn walked down the stairs. "You deserve to be alone for the rest of your life." Swine-face pointed at Nick.

"Shut up!" McHorn said, as he grabbed the pig and cuffed him. He then turned to Nick, "You should have left with Oats. Good thing he stood with us to make sure you weren't confused with the others. Regardless, the job is done. Let's get out of here."

Nick nodded back but remained silent. As the room was cleared out, he took his time leaving the basement. Judy walked past McHorn and Swine-face when she noticed Nick was still inside.

"Nick?" He had just come up the stairs after hearing her voice. "I'm here, yes." He let out a heavy sigh. Judy hugged him, "Come on, why are you still here?"

"I'm just questioning myself needlessly. I'll get over it." He smiled at her with hurt eyes.

"You did the right thing. Don't let anyone make you feel differently," she said.

"Yeah, but that doesn't make it easy. Especially when you're arresting someone you have a history with." Judy hugged his right arm as they walked side by side.

"Well, the important thing is you made the tough call and did your job. I have a slice of blueberry cheesecake you'll love."

"Comfort food sounds good."


	3. Bogo's Smartphone

**Bogo's Smartphone**

Judy managed to go nearly a year without missing a day of work. And she performed at or above average in her assigned duties in just as many days. She, along with several other officers, was going to close out the year with near perfect marks. Today Judy was focused on paperwork in her cubicle. Nick was stationed in the cubicle adjacent to hers. Oddly, this was the first time that they both worked on desk jobs on the same day.

Chief Bogo walked through the cubicles with a smile and an unusual pep in his step. Nick watched the happier than usual buffalo with curious amusement.

"Officer Wilde," Bogo nodded in acknowledgment then turned to Judy. She lifted her gaze to him, also interested in what had made Bogo so happy.

"Judy," he began, "I just sent you and a select few officers a private e-mail. Please be sure to check it before tomorrow evening. I will get back to you early tomorrow to hear your answer."

"Oh, yes sir," she replied. Chief Bogo knocked on her desk wall twice and hummed to himself while walking away. Nick turned to Judy and asked, "Ever seen a jolly buffalo?"

"Not like that, no." Judy shrugged then resumed working on her report. Nick stood up from his seat, unable to remain still. He wanted to move around and expend energy. He wanted to annoy someone.

Phones chirped, and chatter bubbled up around the cubicles as the officers worked. Noises pervaded the room then it would quickly go quiet again. Nick sighed as he looked at his workload: There were five sheets that needed to be completed and signed. And he had two folders full of documents to file. He needed to send some messages to Clawhauser and report back to senior detectives about various crimes including a mugging in the Rainforest district. But he couldn't focus enough to work up the motivation to complete the tasks.

"I have to get this over with," he muttered.

"Keep stalling and thinking and you won't be getting to doing anytime soon," Judy responded to his audible thought. Nick looked at her, nettled.

"Yes, dear. I know."

"Eww, don't call me 'dear' it makes me sound old." She squirmed in her seat.

"Well, how do you think I feel, being eight years older than you all the time?" Judy rolled her eyes and stifled a chuckle.

"What was Bogo saying about an e-mail?" Nick asked.

"Oh, I'll get to that later. When I read it, I'll tell you. I am almost done with this report."

Nick dropped back into his seat and took a deep breath. He blinked slowly then turned to his papers.

"I can do this." Just as he was beginning to write something, Judy's voice disrupted his thoughts again.

"Oh, that's nice." Judy smiled and turned to Nick. He forced himself to ignore her and was grateful that she stopped herself from speaking further after taking a breath. But chatter around the office suddenly picked up again,

"Cool!" Francine walked past the cubicles to Grizzoli with a big grin on her face. She spoke loudly, "I was just invited to a dinner by Chief Bogo. I wonder how many people are going?" Nick's ears perked up. Judy facepalmed herself. Nick put down his pen and moved his papers to the side. He logged into his e-mail and searched for a message from Bogo. No new messages were present.

"Yeah, I think it's only for certain officers with good records," said Grizzoli. Nick sank back in his seat, disappointed.

"So I didn't make the list then."

"Aww, sweet cheese and crackers." Judy turned to Nick with droopy ears.

"No, no, don't worry about me. You go and have fun, A+ student," Nick said.

"Is that alright?" Nick looked at her quizzically.

"Of course it is. What a silly question. I think I could use the alone time anyway." Nick resumed working on his assignments. He privately wondered what it was that caused him to be excluded from the surprise dinner. Was it his repeated lateness? Or maybe it was that one time when he contaminated evidence at a crime scene with spilled coffee? The more he thought about possible reasons, the bigger the list grew. He was surprised by his poor behavior to the point of amusement.

"Yeah, I don't deserve to go," he said with a chuckle. Knowing why he was overlooked by the Chief oddly put him at ease. Nick turned an eye to Judy and saw that she still sulked in her cubicle.

"Oh for the love of justice, Fluff. Just go and have a good time." She blinked and looked at him, then smiled.

"Fine. I will, Love."

"Maybe buffalo butt will do something crazy that you can catch on camera." Nick grinned.

"I'll try to come home with a story," she said. With that settled, they both returned to their individual stacks of papers left to complete.

"It's lunchtime and I'm just starting to get into the work." Nick sighed. "Screw it, I'll just take a later lunch." He gave in to the urge to stretch his muscles and watched as Judy began cleaning up her workspace.

"Done?" Nick asked, surprised. She turned to him and laughed,

"No, silly. Lunch! But I'm three-fourths of the way done." She winked and walked swiftly out of the office, dialing her parent's number. "Show-off," Nick mumbled under his breath and resumed writing. He worked for twenty minutes more before taking his lunch break. "I'm craving fried eel right now."

* * *

The next day, the officers hand-picked by Bogo gathered at a popular street bar called Savanna Stream. Judy expected something a bit more classy and arrived at the bar in a black dress. She brushed her fur and wore a pearl necklace she purchased a month ago. But as she left her home, she suddenly felt over-dressed. When she arrived and noticed the other officers dressed up in their suits and classy attire, she relaxed. It was only Bogo who arrived casually. He wore an expensive brown t-shirt and cargo pants and greeted the other officers with a hearty laugh,

"Look at you bunch. All dressed up! You all thought this was going to be some high-end classy joint? We're here to let loose!" Bogo walked past the officers then waved everyone inside. He turned to a nervous mouse waiter wringing his hands by the counter.

"Party of eight!" said Bogo. The waiter confirmed their reservation. They were seated in a private corner where a large crest shaped bench was placed to accommodate such large gatherings.

Judy walked in last. She waited for her eyes to adjust to the indoor lighting before walking confidently inside. Despite being a street bar, the green walls were freshly painted and bore no blemishes. The professional paint job hid the cheap construction of the bar well. Even the benches were glossed, concealing the age of the furniture. But despite the paint, the tables held many marks from mammals with claws, thick nails, heavy hands and other sharp objects that have marked them over the years.

Judy suspected that Chief Bogo chose this bar because the price of food and drinks were reasonable and the atmosphere was not often flooded with noise. The music was low, and televisions did not line the walls of the bar. The environment at Savanna Stream was kinder to the senses as opposed to other bars.

The officers shared several drinks from different brands of beer. They told stories about past encounters with different Zootopians. When the zebra, Luis finished his tale of a hippo mother dancing in traffic, Judy chimed in,

"There certainly are a lot of weird folks out there."

"Judy, that's a nice dress." Officer Erin said. Erin was a ferret. Like the other officers invited by Bogo, he excelled in his own way and was invited to the dinner because of perfect attendance and an eye for detail. He was a strict by the books officer with a habit of volunteering to pick up after the sloppiness of others.

"Thanks. The straps can get a bit itchy," said Judy. Seeing the other officers relax and converse openly inspired Judy to try speaking up more. Though she worked hard, she didn't mingle much on the team. Many of the other officers were always eager to greet her and were courteous. And yet, Judy still seemed to feel like she never really connected with her coworkers.

Judy reached into her left pocket and pulled out her phone. She smiled and started recording a video of the other officers. Grizzoli played to the camera by waving and making faces. A large fly that landed on Bogo's shoulder. She drew her focus to the bug.

"How about we play spot the fly?" Erin said, noticing what Judy was doing.

"Sounds fun. I'll see how long I can keep an eye on it while it buzzes around." Judy grinned and watched as it jumped up to fly and landed back on Bogo. It danced from shoulder to shoulder and then to the top of his head. The buffalo didn't notice it. He did manage to notice some of the officers staring at him as Judy focused the phone in his direction.

"What's going on here?" He asked with a smile. "Are you all expecting me to break out into a song?"

"Do it!" one officer shouted.

"No, no." He shook his head. The fly was now lost from view. But Judy kept the video playing. "I'll show you some real talent." Bogo grinned. He took out his phone and a small bag from his pants back pocket and placed it on the top of the bench just neighboring their booth.

"I need to make sure I can walk around right. So I just needed to empty my pockets," he explained. He then began observing the bottles of beer on the table, feeling their weight. When he was satisfied he had enough empty bottles of similar weight, he began to place them one by one along his horns and snout.

The crowd watched as he added three, four, five bottles to his load. His head soon resembled a candelabra of sorts. He carefully stepped left and right to the officers' amusement. They lightly applauded and watched as he gracefully balanced the bottles and swayed playfully. Then, as if his balancing act wasn't good enough, he slowly knelt and hopped up, launching the bottles into the air. And with a swift swipe, caught the five bottles with his hands in the air with a loud clink!

"And not a crack to be found!" he gloated. The officers applauded.

"Who knew you could be so graceful?" An officer said.

"Buffalos are a very graceful species," Bogo smirked.

A cheetah waiter walked over to the group holding a large platter that contained fruit pies, a worm salad, and chocolate jello.

"Desserts for the party." The officers reacted excitedly.

"Yes!"

"Best part of the meal."

"Don't drop my jello!" As the dishes were handed out, Judy sighed as she got her dessert, a carrot cake. She went back to the video she had just recorded and messaged Nick. She sent him the video and added,

"I wish you were here to see it. Maybe you should come by so that I don't go home alone." She was so distracted waiting for his reply that she barely listened to Francine as she spoke.

"Chocolate jello is my favorite," the elephant said.

After ten agonizing minutes, Judy finally got a reply,

"The Chief is a wizard! Sure, I'll be around. Where are you?" Judy couldn't resist leering into her phone. Her ears twitched to Grizzoli suddenly saying,

"Ooh, she must be texting the fox." Grizzoli elbowed Francine. Judy ignored them, continuing to leer into her phone and typing.

"Close by, actually. You could walk here. I'm at the Savanna Stream."

"Oh wow. I'll be there in twenty minutes, no problem. Just tell me when." Nick replied.

The night was fast approaching an end for the officers. Bogo began to show signs of weariness and the chatter had faded significantly. They sat in the comfortable silence of each others company. Judy had alerted Nick beforehand, and she expected he would be outside the bar to meet her.

Francine spotted him first and said, "Oh, here comes the handsome red devil now." Chief Bogo burst into a smile and greeted him enthusiastically,

"Hey! Someone couldn't resist reeling you in, huh?" Bogo's speech slightly slurred as he spoke. His breath reeked of alcohol.

"Oh, leave the bunny alone, Sir," Nick said as he made his way to Judy. He affectionately brushed the top of her head with his chin. She curled her shoulders and hid her face behind her ears. The group broke into low audible aww's at the public display of affection.

"They are so cute I could just die," Erin said. Nick sat next to her as the other officers began to stand and stretch. He whispered into her ear,

"You look lovely tonight." The mess of their meal summoned a dutiful waiter to their table. The skunk swiftly worked to remove empty plates and bottles from the table as he passed by. The officers said their farewells for the night and left one by one.

When Nick and Judy were alone, they walked out of the restaurant together.

"Thanks for showing up," Judy said.

"Of course. You ask and I arrive." Nick stared at her outfit and grinned. He lingered on the curve of her chest. "Did you have fun?" he asked.

"Yes. It was nice. Quite the family we have, huh?"

"Family seems like a strong word, But I guess it's appropriate."

"The camaraderie is true," said Judy. Chief Bogo was seen hurrying back to the restaurant with a worried expression.

"Hey! Guys," he opened up his arms and upon approaching, motioned for them to huddle in as he pushed them back to the restaurant.

"What's going on?" Judy asked, concerned.

"I can't find my phone!" Bogo said. "It has sensitive information on it. I'm the chief of police damn it. We have to find it."

"Shit..." Nick mumbled under his breath. He turned back to the restaurant and glanced at the tables around him. He saw nothing but the old tables in all their scratched and abused splendor.

"Where was it last?" Nick asked.

"I remember pulling it out of my pocket with my bag and..."

he tried to reenact what he had done, pointing to where they all sat down for the evening. He looked at the spot where he placed his bag and phone last, but could not remember if he picked up both items or just the bag. Considering that he only had his bag with him, he was becoming convinced that he had misplaced it and could not remember how or exactly when it happened.

"What does it look like?" Nick asked.

"It's brown and wide. A new smartphone. The company is GrapeTech"

"I'll ask around," said Judy, trying to ignore the effects of the drinks she had.

"Good! Good, do that." Bogo said, frantically. Nick and Judy agreed to split up as they searched the restaurant. Nick approached a drunk beaver stumbling down the right corner of booths.

"Excuse me, have you noticed any phone around?"

"Eh? Whose phone?" The beaver looked up at him with half-lidded eyes. He slightly lurched forward then regained his balance.

"This phone belongs to a friend of mine. It is brown and flat. Wide, with a Grape logo on the back."

"Oh!" The beaver smiled.

"Yeah, yeah. Just see, I have this thing like you described. Yes."

"That's great" Nick smiled, "Can you hang here for a second? I'll get my friend right away."

"Sure, I'll show it to you guys when you come back." The beaver coughed and rubbed his eyes. He grunted and mumbled to himself as Nick walked away. Nick found the Chief outside the Bar, anxiously looking around and swearing to himself.

"Hey, Chief."

"Did you see it?"

"I found this beaver guy who might know something. But he is pretty hammered."

"Fair enough, take me to him!" Nick led Bogo into the bar and to the spot where he talked to the beaver. But as they approached, the beaver was nowhere in sight.

"Wait, he was right..."

"Damn it, Wilde," the Chief looked around to nobody.

"But, he was right here."

"I'll check the bathroom," Bogo said and hurried inside. Judy approached Nick.

"Bogo going off on you again?" She asked with red tired eyes.

"No, just..." he stopped and looked out the window, noticing the beaver stumbling outside. "How did he?" Nick ran out of the bar, forcing Judy to chase after him.

"Hey! Did you find anything?" she asked as she ran to him.

"Hey, you!" Nick pointed to the beaver.

"What?" he replied in a rasped voice.

"The phone. Remember? You said you had a flat brown phone?" Nick waited for an answer. The beaver smiled with heavy half-closed eyes. He swayed as he turned around,

"Oh yeah! Here it is! Here's your brown flat thing! Ha ha ha!" The beaver smacked the street with his tail.

"Oh, you've got to be kidding me." Nick scoffed and turned away from the beaver. Judy stood between the two of them confused as the beaver clumsily jogged away. Chief Bogo walked out of the restaurant and approached.

"Judy, please tell me you have useful information?"

"Nope. The bartender said people just casually packed up and left. There wasn't anybody that approached the front to leave a phone." The Chief rubbed his face and sighed.

"This is not good. And It's so late." He stared at the dark empty streets. Nick turned to Bogo,

"So sorry, Sir. It turns out the beaver was just a drunk comedian and didn't have the phone."

"Hopps, Wilde, I know it's much to ask, and it's late. If you could keep searching, I'd be so grateful. I think I'm going to head home."

"Why can't we call your phone?" Nick asked.

"Because he turned it off," Judy said. Her ears stood straight up and she excitedly added,

"Wait! I'll call some of the other officers! Maybe one of them grabbed it?"

"If so, one of them would have given it to me," Bogo replied. "But it is worth a shot." He then scowled and wrinkled his brow as he stared at Judy with his hands on his hips, "Except, I can't give you the numbers to the other officers' phones because I don't have them as contacts. And I don't have my phone to give you their numbers anyway!" Nick bit his lip, struck by mixed feelings of panic and amusement.

"Ugh, forget it," said a frustrated Judy.

"Let's just call it a night. Maybe early tomorrow something will happen that will lead to it turning up. So long as nobody hacks into it." The Chief walked away anxiously but abruptly turned to add, "It was a good night. Thanks for coming."

"Sure thing, Chief. Thank you," Judy replied. Nick scratched his head as he stood with Judy on the sidewalk. If he had been part of the party, maybe he could have questioned more people present at the restaurant. He looked at Judy and noticed her weariness.

"Why don't you go home?" Judy looked up at him with a blank expression.

"Judy?" He grabbed her left ear and gently stroked it from her head to tip. She smiled lightly and shook her head, "I'm trying to remember who I saw in the bar."

"Hah! You are not going to be wandering the streets close to midnight dressed like that questioning random crazy nocturnal mammals asking about a cop's phone," Nick said.

"Ugh..." Judy slumped her shoulders and nodded. She rubbed her face and sighed.

"Fine, forget it."

"Good. You go home." She looked at him and froze.

"You said, 'you' and not 'we.' Wait, what are you going to do?" Judy asked.

"I'll keep looking,"

"By yourself?" she asked with mild bewilderment.

"Yes." She placed her hands on her hips and bit her lip,

"I know you're a jokester, but you weren't even with us. Why in the world would you try looking?" Nick knew he was attempting to do something ridiculous. The motivation behind this decision was no better. He believed that finding the phone would be a good start to being a better cop for next year. He wanted to get on the Chief's good side and figured finding the phone would help him win the buffalo over.

"I just..." he weighed his words, not wanting to reveal the embarrassing reason for choosing to continue searching. "I just want something to do for the night. It might be fun."

"You are so odd sometimes. You better call me if anything happens," Judy said, too tired to continue the conversation.

"Yes, boss." Nick hugged her and said, "I won't be out too late." He watched Judy walk away and stared at her tail as it swayed left and right. The black dress made her fur stand out. She glowed under the copper tinted street lights.

"Bronze bunny," he mumbled. Nick then turned his attention to the restaurant in front of him once more and began walking toward the back of the parking lot.

* * *

Nick passed by a row of garbage cans that were color coded for recycling. Next to them sat one large dumpster for miscellaneous trash. He jumped up and peeked over the open rim of the tall dumpster looking left and right. Not noticing anything of interest, he hopped down from the edge and continued further back. In the parking lot were a pair of skunks chatting in low anxious voices. One wore a blue beanie hat with a long-sleeve shirt and pants. The other was dressed in a worn-out red buttoned shirt and white shorts.

"Look, let's see about that guy," Nick heard one skunk say.

"Hey, you." The other skunk began walking toward Nick, putting him on alert.

"Sir, you interested in some tree spice?" The skunk flashed a small plastic bag containing a mixture of ground tree bark and an unknown mixture of other powders. Nick slumped his shoulders and stared slack.

"Oh, no I'd rather not, thanks." He took a step back, watching the nervous skunk in the back.

"Come on. You look like you could use a good kick to those senses. This will wake you up fast!"

"You guys are so lucky that I'm not working right now," Nick muttered.

"Whatever, guy. Just buy some or something," said the nervous skunk.

"Hey, did you guys happen to see a phone around here?" Nick asked.

"No, but we'll help you out if you buy some spice." Nick rolled his eyes. He knew it was illegal but not seeing anyone around, he needed to find a way to get rid of the skunks.

"Fine. If it will get you to help me by going away, I'll take some."

The skunks cheered, "Alright, we got a customer! Good choice." The skunk in the white shorts approached Nick and stood uncomfortably close,

"Easy fellas. Little breathing room here?"

"Forty bucks," said the skunk in the blue hat. Nick paid the skunks and took the bag of spice, frowning.

"Good thing I always carry cash on me," he muttered as the skunks walked away, encouraged by their illegal sale. "Note to self: arrest delinquent dealer skunks." Nick looked around the empty lot unsure of what to do. His ears twitched to the sound of a car slowly rolling by. Nick turned and was blinded by a flashlight being pointed at him.

"Sir, can you come on over, please?"

 _Oh no..._

"Sure thing, Officer," Nick said. He discreetly stuffed the drugs into his shirt pocket and nervously walked towards the police car.

"What can I do for ya?" The raccoon officer looked at Nick and said,

"You want to tell me why you are wandering a parking lot at midnight?" It seemed like a fair question. The officer lowered his flashlight and studied Nick.

"Well, I was helping a friend who lost his phone, and when he got sick of searching and left, I decided to stay just a moment longer."

"When did you think you it got lost?"

"Oh, we think it must have been lost about an hour or two ago."

The officer considered the foxes replies then said,

"Just standard procedure, can I see some identification please?" Nick sighed in relief when he remembered he had an updated license that showed him registered with the ZPD.

"Sure thing." Nick reached into his pants pocket.

"Slowly, sir," the officer said as he eyed Nick's hands closely.

"Oh, I understand," Nick replied. "Can't be too careful, huh?"

"Not in my line of work," the officer replied. Nick pulled out his wallet and handed the officer his ID.

"Oh, look at that." The raccoon smiled as he looked at the license. "Alright. This will be just a second." The officer rolled up his window and performed a security check. Nick turned to look back at the parking lot. He took a deep breath to calm the anxiety under his fur from carrying drugs in his shirt pocket. As soon as he drifted in thought, a voice pulled him back to alertness.

"You can go about your business, Officer Wilde."

"Thank you, sir." Nick nodded, took his license and swiftly walked away. Damn, that was too close. Rattled by the midnight encounters, Nick submitted to his failure and headed home.

Nick opened the front door carefully and walked through it as if he were entering a trapped house. He pushed the door closed behind him, attempting to use the knob for leverage but his paw slipped off the handle.

"Whoops," Nick cringed as the door slammed shut.

"Ah!" Judy sat up, "What was that?" She jumped out of bed with a fright.

"Sorry, the doorknob slipped from my paw," said Nick. Judy rubbed her nose,

"So, how did your impossible task go?" Judy took a deep calming breath to relax her still shaking nerves.

"About as good as it was going to. I ran into some funny looking skunks in the parking lot."

"Oh yeah?" Judy asked curiously.

"In order to get them to go away, I bought spice from them." Judy rested her paws on her hips. Nick lowered his head as he prepared to be scolded by the cutest annoyed bunny he's ever seen.

"You silly fox!" Judy chuckled. "You stood behind to look for the Chief's phone. Not purchase drugs..."

"I threw them away," he assured her.

"Why didn't you report the skunks?" Judy asked. Nick sighed and scratched his right ear, "I just didn't want to get involved. Besides, I wasn't on the job. Can't I be a civilian for just a few hours?" Judy growled. Nick resisted flinching as Judy reached out with a stretched paw.

"An off-duty cop is still a cop, Nick." She scratched the underside of his chin. The forced affection was perhaps a substitute for her wishing to do something more unpleasant.

"Ooh, that's nice. Right there." His tongue lolled out of his muzzle.

"Clean up and get to bed. You smell like a dumpster."

"Oh, you're a mean bunny." Nick awoke at 7:00 A.M. to the sound of Judy's phone beeping with a text message. It was Chief Bogo, and he was texting from his smartphone. When Judy got out of the bathroom, Nick gave her the phone.

"Look, Judy. A happy ending." Judy took her phone and read the message:

"I managed to get my phone back. A tundra fox was at the bar last night and confused it with hers. She picked up my phone as she was leaving the bar. When she noticed the different home screen, she figured it wasn't hers. By this time the bar had already closed. She didn't know how to unlock the phone to make an emergency call, so she decided to drop it off here at the station!"

"Good fortune, Chief Bogo!" Judy replied.

"Dang, I was hoping I'd find it," confessed Nick.

"Oh yeah? Trying to look good?" Judy teased.

"I'll do better next year," Nick said. "No more lateness. Or accidents." Judy walked to their shared closet and pulled out his uniform. She tossed it on the bed then said, "How about we start today since you're up early?" Nick looked at his clothes then picked up the badge pinned to his shirt. He felt the engravings and grooves along its surface and said, "Sure. Today."


	4. The Mugging of Simon

**8/22/2018 - See my profile for news!**

* * *

 **The Mugging Of Simon**

Nick blinked against the dulled sunlight piercing his aviators. It was a private wonder how even with his eyes guarded behind shades, the sun could still have such a powerful effect on his sight. He directed the beam toward Judy with a mischievous grin, deriving pleasure from annoying her. He felt particularly devilish today. She blinked and grunted, making that cute angry face he adored.

"Cut it out!" she cried.

"But I'm not through bugging you." He reached over to her side of the car and scratched at the back of her ears. She shook her head and smiled before swatting his paw away.

"Officers!" The pair jumped in the seats of their idle patrol car. Running up the driver's side of the vehicle was a distressed fox flailing his arms and squealing. Nick cringed when he heard the voice. "I've been robbed! Help!"

Judy switched on the lights of their car, a signal that informed citizens and officers alike that this patrol car was now on duty. Nick lowered his glasses and raised a brow at the flamboyantly dressed fox. His brown scarf sat harried along his shoulders, draped over a pink shirt. His lemon-yellow pants were offensive to the eyes, and his white bouffant hair looked like a fluffed dollop of whipped cream sitting on his head. None of the clothing complimented his dirty-yellow fur. And Nick felt queasy at the colorful chaos standing next to their car.

"Alright, Sir," said Nick, "let's take it from-" the strange fox let out what Nick thought was a yelp,

"Ooh!"

"-the top?"

"I'm sorry. You're just so handsome!" Judy looked at Nick. He softly sighed. This victim was going to be a hassle, he could tell. Judy's sudden smirk was particularly unnerving. _Uh oh..._

"Sir, why don't we just start with your name?" Nick and Judy exited their car and stood next to the distressed fox.

"My name is Simon Riles."

"And what happened, exactly? Before you were distracted by this lovely fox here." Judy pinched Nick's cheek. He tensed up and took a step away from them and pretended to look around for anyone suspicious.

"Oh, before I saw sexy over here," Simon gestured to Nick, "I was leaving a grocery store when this mean, nasty, hulking skunk knocked me down and dug into my pockets!" Judy nodded, taking quick notes of the animated fox's story. Nick fumed to himself. This was too much. Simon was quite a character, and his squealing voice grated on his nerves more than he was willing to admit. But he needed to be professional. _I'm a cop...I'm a cop...I'm a cop._ The mantra was broken by Simon suddenly staring straight into his face.

"Are you okay, Pumpkin?"

"Pumpkin?"

"Well, you're a little chubby. It's so cute!"

"Hey, I'm not-"

"Yeah, Nick. You put on just a wee bit of weight these past few months. It's barely noticeable but, it is noticeable." The embarrassment stung. Judy was going to get a real teasing later. It was not fair that she was taking his side. Turncoat.

"Some partner you are, Judy. Can we just get to where it happened and start from there? Then you can tell me what was lost and we can file a report?"

"Sure!" Simon stood straight up then twirled on his heels. His hair bobbed up and down with impossible weightlessness and the end of his harried scarf swung behind him. Judy ducked just in time, leaving Nick to be slapped in the face by the heavily perfumed fabric. He coughed and wheezed for air. Did Simon bathe in perfume? The noxious odor was unbearable. They chased him down a narrow street smothered by the shadows of large buildings.

"This is what you get for picking on me in the car."

"Please, have mercy," begged Nick.

"He seems harmless," Judy shrugged.

"Speak for yourself, you traitor."

"Right here!" Simon pointed at the entrance of a clothing shop called, 'Glitter Paws.' Nick, letting his mantra of, "I'm a cop" sink in, listened intently as Simon reenacted the events of the crime. He tried not to laugh at Simon's exaggerated movements and absurd white bouffant hair.

"Then the smelly creep dug in my pockets and stole my wallet and armbag." Simon sniffled and pouted. Judy offered him a comforting shoulder. Nick slouched and lumbered over with mild sympathy.

"We'll keep a lookout," said Nick. "We have the description and some of the details. Come with us back to our car. We will file an official report and alert nearby patrols. But that is all we could do for now." Simon swooned and swayed on his paws.

"Sure thing! My heroes."

"Yeah, alright." Nick tried to put an extra foot of distance between him and Simon as they walked back to their vehicle, but Simon kept closing that distance and giggling. Nick fell back into his mantra, _I'm a chubby cop...I'm a chubby cop. No!_ He turned to Judy,

"If I end up round like Clawhauser, I'm jumping into traffic."

"I can set you up with a good trainer who will get an iron grip on your eating habits," said Simon.

"Zip it," Nick grumbled.

"Fine. Grumpy Pumpkin."

"Don't mind the pumpkin," said Judy. "He likes you."

"Don't," barked Nick. He muttered defeatedly, "You suck." Though Nick didn't particularly dislike Simon, he did find the attention annoying. Simon was amusing, to say the least. Once they returned to the car, Nick reached over through the window. Simon whistled, and when Nick felt a paw on his tail, yelped,

"Hey!" He stood up in surprise and slammed his head on the underside of the car's roof. Judy tugged on his tail. At least it was Judy. That was a relief. She grinned at him and said,

"Just showing you off to our friend here." Nick crossed his arms after shoving the incident report sheet at Judy.

"I'll tell Bogo." He grinned when he saw Judy's ears lower slightly. Finally, some leverage in the fight.

"No fair, not our boss!" whined Judy.

"Yes," Nick placed heavy emphasis on the words, "our boss." Judy lowered her eyes, embarrassed at the possibility of actually pushing too far. But Nick couldn't fault her. He wasn't above such behavior himself. He planted a comforting kiss between her ears.

"Aawwww..." Leaving his lips pressed against her head, he turned scornful eyes toward Simon.

"Fill out the incident report and let's get rid of him already." Judy blinked, having enough of the fox herself,

"Yeah, good idea." Judy took the details from Simon once more, double checking what she had written down then handing the report back to Nick as he waited in the patrol car. They shook hands with Simon who, with an unusual cheer for someone who was just mugged, happily bid the officers a goodbye and hurried off to wherever he was headed.

Now back in the seats of their vehicle, Nick and Judy looked at each other for a second.

"Come on, that guy is hysterical."

"You played me good," said Nick.

"Oh?"

"You always know how to get the upper hand."

"I got lucky with this one. He was just too good to not use against you." Nick shook his head. What a relationship. He was already trying to work his brain to come up with a new scheme.

"One of these days, Judy. I'm going to get you." She laughed confidently,

"Bring it on, Slick." They leaned toward each other in the car, intent on a kiss. From the corner of Nick's eyes, in the rearview mirror, he saw a bulky figure with black fur and a white stripe running down the length his body and his large fluffy tail. The figure was nervously walking across the street. Nick grabbed Judy's face with a paw, smooshing up her cheeks with his fingers and forced it toward the mirror.

"Look!" Her eyes went wide as she saw the mammal then did a double take of her notes.

"Let's go!"


	5. Sick

**Sick**

"I'm right behind you, Fluff." Nick snatched the gift box from his fridge and briskly padded out the door. Simon, the victim of a mugging three weeks ago, was so grateful for the capture of the skunk and the return of his belongings that he gifted Nick and Judy a mystery cake. Judy passed on the offer, but Nick could smell the aroma of blueberries seeping out of the box.

He impatiently tore open the box while Judy drove to the station.

"I've never seen anyone so obsessed with blueberries until I met you," laughed Judy.

"You're really missing out. Oh yes..." Nick drooled as he caught a glimpse of the cake. Sitting there in its half melted glory was a slice of blueberry cheesecake. Its gooey dark purple syrup was spilling over the sides.

"Speedbump, Love," Judy warned. Nick greedily stuffed the cake into his mouth just as the car was climbing the slope of the bump. Syrup oozed from his muzzle and down his neck. He rocked in the seat as the car leveled off then made its descent from the bump. With the cake safe in Nick's belly, his only concern was cleaning up the stickiness from his fur as they closed the distance to the station.

"Even when you inhaled the cake, you still managed to make a mess. You gotta slow down."

"Sowwry mawm," mumbled Nick behind a mouthful of leftover cake.

"If you choke, I'm taking selfies with you panicking in the background." Nick coughed and swallowed hard.

"Oh! Don't do that. Haha!"

"No wonder you got chubby."

"Oh, right..." Nick lowered his ears, ashamed that he had let himself put on weight. A moment later, Judy parked their car in the lot behind the station. It wasn't long after Nick took his first few steps toward the station that Nick started noticing some disturbance in his belly. His tongue began to sour, and the first hint of the foul aroma emanating from within momentarily stunned him. He shook it off and ignored the sensations.

Later, on the drive to their assigned location in the Rainforest District, Nick gulped down a small bottle of water he had in the police car hoping to calm the disturbance in his stomach. Suddenly, a terribly sharp screech of tires and then a loud crash startled the officers.

"Sweet cheese and crackers, an accident!?" Judy hit the lights and siren of the car and sped around the corner. Up ahead, sticking to the corner of a wooden shop was a car with its front end lodged in the wall. Mammals on the sidewalk were scattered about. Dazed and shook up from the collision.

"Officers! Help!" A female beaver ran to Nick and Judy. Nick carefully walked out of his patrol car and sighed. The driver of the damaged vehicle couldn't be seen from his angle. He put up a paw to silence the panicked beaver and analyzed the scene with Judy.

"Come on, make some space!" commanded Judy. She was already on the other side of the incident and had a better vantage when Nick heard her say, "He's okay. Airbag and seatbelt." Nick nodded, then turned to the beaver.

"Alright, ma'am. Anything you would..." his tongue grew heavy with the sourness again. _Oh no...I gotta hold out._ He ignored the queasy sensations clamoring for his attention. "Did you see what..." Nick took a deep breath. Bad move. He tried shortening his sentence. "What hagkh!" In what was probably less than a second, Nick projected a stream of partially digested cake and other stomach contents at the witness.

"Aah!" She recoiled in disgust as her face and clothes were smothered in chunky barf. The baffled bystanders groaned in horror.

"What?" Judy met Nick's pitiful gaze as he was bent over, spitting on the street.

"Shlorry! Sorry!" He wiped his muzzle with the sleeve of his uniform, clearing away snot and barf and dry heaved in the opposite direction, trying to avoid worsening the situation. With lowered ears and reddened cheeks, Judy stumbled to her partner, groaning from the smell.

"Of all the times..." The noises of the crowd were a horrible mix of disapproved cries, laughter and distress.

Nick waved off Judy,

"Just go to the victim..." Thinking fast, Judy ignored Nick and tried to follow procedure as best as she could. Ever the good partner, when people were distracted by Nick's stomach-churning spectacle, she forcefully returned their focus to the accident. An ambulance was called, a report was filed, and after an embarrassing hour of apologies, making up with the angry witness, and graceless heroics on the job, Nick found himself sitting before a speechless Chief Bogo.

The silence in the room was painfully awkward. It allowed Nick to hear the crowds groans of disgust replaying in his head. Chief Bogo inhaled to speak, but only sighed and threw his arms up in defeat when he couldn't come up with anything to say.

"You saw the whole thing?" Nick squeaked.

"The dash cam of the car caught it all," Bogo said, clearing his throat and awkwardly shifting his gaze away from Nick. It was quite a shock not being tongue-lashed by Bogo.

"I had no idea that the cake I ate went bad. Just mild food poisoning..." In a rare expression of sympathy, Bogo said,

"There will be some noise made over this, but the less that is said about it, the quicker it will go away. You're obviously um...sick. And I'm sending you home early. But if there is any further disturbance, you will be required to make a public apology. Let's just hope it doesn't come down to that. And damn it, make better choices with your food." Nick fidgeted in his seat. If word got out over the media, he'd be stuck being seen as the fox that barfs on beavers. He shook his head and stifled a whimper.

"Sir, I spoke with the witness, slash victim. She said she would, 'get over it' and that I shouldn't worry." Bogo shook his head.

"Regardless. What people say and do often don't match up. Now..." The chief gave Nick an unsettling smirk and said in an unusually soft voice,

"Shut your face. Go home." Nick slowly rose from his seat, happy to leave the stuffy office.


	6. Bugs

**Bugs**

Nick walked through the double-door entrance of the police department and passed by Wolford with a friendly nod. He gave no committed response save for a quick glance back. No surprise to Nick. Wolford was either always in a rush or often too entertained with the thoughts in his head. Nick approached the front desk and rested his paws on top of it. The stunned wide-eyed look Clawhauser gave him made Nick feel suddenly inadequate.

"Yikes. did I break something already?"

"Where is your other half?"

"Oh, Judy will be late." Clawhauser gasped stupidly,

"Late? Never!" Nick smirked and rubbed a finger on the desk.

"Well, it was a _hard_ night. She needed an extra half hour." He winked at Clawhauser who sighed in pity.

"Aww. Poor Judy. At least she's well enough for work." Nick shook his head and signed his name on the sign-in sheet.

"You're hopeless, Spots." He walked into the bullpen and glanced at the empty side of his chair. He sat and immediately noticed an odd sense of emptiness. Like something crucial was missing. He shook his head and listened to Bogo's morning brief. As Bogo was going to address Nick's duty, he noticed the empty side of Nick's chair.

"Wher–"

"Here I am!" Judy rushed into the bullpen, huffing all the way to her spot next to Nick. And with that, the day felt normal again. Judy gingerly climbed up to the seat, not daring to try her usual bunny hop. She sat up and winced as she moved her hips and scooted in the chair. Bogo squinted at her and mumbled.

"Anyway, as I was saying; Nick will be stationed just outside of rodentia. You do not have clearance to enter, however. We do not need a scurry. I'm not interested in putting up with foxzilla reports from terrified mice. Not today."

"I read you loud and clear, Chief." Judy let out a low whimper. Nick looked at her and winced when she punched him in the arm. "Aye. Sorry." He laughed knowing exactly why she hit him. "I told you I'm too long for you."

"You tried to impale me last night."

"Judy, am I understood?" Nick and Judy looked to their chief, who waited patiently for Judy's response.

"Oh? Sorry, Chief Bogo. Can you repeat that?"

"I said you will be stationed along the east border of rodentia, keeping on the lookout for speeders There has been a rise in complaints regarding structural damage to the buildings in rodentia because of careless drivers."

"Yes, sir."

"It wasn't on purpose," said Nick. "When a guy reaches the end it's like his whole body wants to shoot out of his–"

"Nevermind it," interrupted Judy. Nick sighed in defeat and fidgeted with the badge on his uniform.

"Let's go, Hopps."

Judy grinned as she looked around her steering wheel. She leaned left and right enthusiastically and peered out of the car from her side window, the dashboard, and any other opening within eye or paws reach.

"You're really enjoying the new height supports they gave you, huh shorty?"

"Oh, it's so much better. I can finally see everything properly and hit the pedals easily. It's great." Nick watched the streets pass by in front of him. He pressed his shoulders into his seat, shrugging into the comfortable padding. He flexed his fingers and toes, trying to loosen up the stiffness he felt in his joints. "I'll drop you off by the entrance to rodentia, then I'll head around with the car."

"Look, there's a gerbil waving at us." From just up the street, standing next to the gate of rodentia stood a dirty clothed gerbil. He wore boots and suspenders hinting at hard labor work. Nick focused his gaze on the dirty mammal as he waved his arms through the air. His voice could barely be heard through the car, but Nick's ears were perfect for catching the sound. "He wants our attention, Judy. Pull up in front of him."

"Alright. Let's see what we got." The distressed gerbil was lost to view as they pulled up, Nick opened his passenger door and carefully stepped out, looking down to make sure his steps were clear and gerbil-free.

"Officers! Yes! How do you do?"

"You tell us, sir. How may we help?" Nick bent to a knee. Judy stood close by, her butt inches from his head. The gerbil scratched behind his ear and grunted. He looked at Judy then Nick, as if finally realizing the species of officers he was talking to.

"Uh, my home was broken into and someone smashed my stuff!" He stamped his feet and scratched a little more. Judy's ears drooped sympathetically.

"Do you know anyone that has some sort of grudge against you?" asked Nick.

"No! I don't bother anyone, I just go to work in the rainforest, then I come back home and do nothing all night. Someone smashed my radio and just left."

"Anything else broken?" asked Judy. She pulled out a notepad and pen and began hastily scribbling down the gerbil's remarks.

"Just my television and radio. And they left the pieces everywhere." Nick turned to Judy. It was unusual for a gerbil to want outside help when there was already a rodent squad that could deal with such matters. Judy was already in line with Nick's thoughts and asked,

"Why come to us and not call for rodentia's police force?" The gerbil huffed at the question and picked at the fur under his chin.

"I would if I could find anyone to care! There are so many mice in rodentia. Good luck getting a mouse cop to help you when you need it. It's a wonder why there aren't more doing the smart thing and asking for your help! You're bigger. You can get around faster. Please look into my apartment and see what's up?"

"Oh no, Chief Bogo would have my head if I go into rodentia."

"I'll do it," offered Judy.

"No."

"Yes!" The gerbil cheered. "It's alright, just come on over and take a quick peek." There was no fighting Judy once she decided on something. But Nick worried about taking some of the blame for Judy's actions. He's gone nearly a month without a complaint from Bogo. His longest record. And he hoped to remain clear of Bogo's wrath for as long as possible.

"Sir, what is your name?" asked Nick.

"Dan Coston. Oh, and as far as I know, nothing was stolen!" Dan reached out and Nick offered a finger for shaking.

"This is sounding more and more like a vendetta against you," said Judy. "I'll head on in. If you can just point me to the place?"

"Sure!" Without any acknowledgment of Nick, Dan and Judy entered rodentia, with Dan hopping up to sit on Judy's shoulder. As soon as they entered, Nick heard the muttered apologies from Judy as she carefully tip-toed her way to Dan's apartment. Nick watched her from over the metal fence.

She bent a knee just beyond rodentia's above ground train and peered into a window. Nick began to scratch his arm.

"Nick," called Judy. "Get me a magnifying glass."

"Yes, boss." He turned back to the police car and dug into the glove compartment. He moved over a licensed pistol and portable mirror, shuffled over some papers and a ticket book, and carefully pulled out a magnifying glass with one paw keeping the other items protected from falling out of the box. He yelped at a sudden sting in his paw and scratched some more and grumbled.

"What is going on with me scratching?" Nick rushed back to the border of rodentia and reached over to pass Judy the magnifying glass. "What'd you see?"

"A mess." Dan sheepishly looked away.

"I'm usually not that messy." He hastily scratched behind his ear. Nick's face drooped as he watched the gerbil. Judy turned with the magnifying glass, leaving Nick with mouth agape. He sighed and loudly whispered,

"Hey! Judy!" She dismissed him with a wave of her paw and peered into Dan's window. After a moment, she recoiled, standing straight up.

"Eww!"

"Whoa, bunny!" Dan nearly flipped through the air and held on to Judy's shoulder like he was riding a bull.

"Sorry." She threw a flustered look at Nick and quickly but gently peeled Dan off her shoulder. "Sir, it looks like the intruder definitely has something against you. What were you doing the last few nights before this happened?" Her cutely tilted ears were a sure sign that Judy discovered what Nick feared. And when Judy's finger twitched, no doubt resisting the urge to scratch at something, somewhere, Nick rolled his eyes.

"I did play music two nights ago. And last night."

"Bingo. You may have angered a neighbor. And this person took the time to retaliate. No biggie. But..." Judy growled in frustration and scratched her neck. Nick couldn't resist a smirk. She was cursed. The more annoyed she looked, the cuter she got.

 _No wonder I'm a jerk to her._ "Do you know about the bug problem in your house? The wide-eyed frown Dan gave Judy was a clear enough no.

"Where do you work again?"

"In the Rainforest District. Construction stuffs, Officer..."

"Hopps." Judy urgently pantomimed a spray can with her paws at Nick. He shrugged his shoulders in distress and mouthed the words,

"I tried to warn you."

"I think we have all the information we need. We'll question the neighbors and see what we can dig up. In the meantime, Dan, look into pesticide ASAP." The itchy gerbil nodded ashamed and said,

"Yes, Officer Hopps." Nick leaned against their patrol car and sighed. Judy returned and handed him the magnifying glass. He looked at her worried expression and rapidly tapping foot.

"Okay, Fluff. Let's go get some bug spray and see how we can prevent this from getting any worse."

"Oh, wait!" He paused in mid-reach of the car door.

"Ideas?"

"I want to take a sample of the bugs for evidence. The gerbil that broke into Dan's home will no doubt have picked up the bugs too." Nick grinned and poked Judy's nose.

"That would make this case open and shut. Easy work. Good thinking, Hopps."

"Of course it's good thinking." She strolled past him and entered the driver's seat. She shook her head and smiled as Nick assisted her with some gentle scratching behind her ears.

"Oh, right there. Yes."

"Just keep your paws on the wheel. I got ya, Fluff." She sighed in relief.

"Some mammals can be so careless," said Judy.

"Hey, we all overlook something every now and then."

"Simply overlooking something and being totally oblivious aren't exactly the same thing." Nick reached behind him for an evidence bag. He looked at the bag then at Judy's fur and focused his gaze on the spot that itched her the most. He refrained from plucking a hair off of Judy when the thought of Chief Bogo came to mind. They were not allowed to enter Rodentia. So to keep their visit hidden, Nick thought it better to wait to meet the victim again. _Even better if we could get the suspect._

Judy parked just a few blocks away from her patrol post. They walked through a shopping district often populated by elk and mustelids. Here, they found a store specializing in the extermination of weeds and bugs. And in front of the store, Nick read a sign: PLEASE, INFECTED MAMMALS USE BUG GUARDS NEAR DOOR BEFORE ENTERING.

Bolted to the metal frame of the shop door was a container with long plastic sleeves and aprons. Nick helped Judy with her apron and Judy, in turn, helped with his. Judy briefly gagged as Nick tightly tied her plastic apron.

"All set for your haircut, Hopps?" She adjusted the apron for comfort and said,

"Hush." Nick's ears twitched to a grumbling voice. He turned to find the source of the muttering; a female gerbil angrily pulled off her tiny bug guards and stamped out of the shop. She carried a black bag with two long cans about half her height and froze to the sound of Nick clearing his throat.

"Ms?" She turned with a quizzical expression. The gerbil soon registered surprise as she stared at Nick and Judy. She recognized the uniforms and badges on their shirts. Nick scratched at his shoulder and the gerbil blinked. He didn't say another word, instead choosing to observe her reaction. She trembled suddenly and grit her teeth. She lifted a finger and scratched once, then turned and ran, dropping her supplies.

"Bingo," said Judy. Nick darted after the suspect, who swiftly ran a path toward a parked vehicle. Nick's flimsy plastic apron flew up as he ran, temporarily blocking his vision. He tore the plastic off and searched with his ears, nose, and eyes for any sign of the suspect.

"For fat gerbils, they sure run fast!"

"Got you covered, Nick." Judy was already on the other side of the car, free from her bug guards and kneeling with the flashlight from her holster. Nick could smell the gerbil.

"She should still be...there!" Judy dived under the car.

"No! It wasn't me!" She just missed and Nick watched as it skittered around a tire and onto the street. He ran around the car and stopped when he saw Wolford scooping up the gerbil in his paws.

"What's going on here, you two?" He gripped the gerbil like he was holding a potato. A potato that squirmed and wriggled in his paws. Nick gently scratched the suspect on her head in a soothing manner,

"We just want to ask you a few questions. Wolford, this gerbil is a potential suspect in a break-in." Wolford looked at the frightened gerbil in his paw.

"You know, nothing suggests guilt quite like running away from an officer."

"Oh, sweet cheese and crackers." Judy approached with ears down. "Wolford that gerbil has fleas!"

"Aww!" He looked at the gerbil as if he was planning on throwing it.

"Can you hand her over, please?" asked Judy.

"Here, take the thing." He shoved the suspect into Judy's paws and shook his hands in disgust.

"Hey, screw you, dog!" She fiercely scratched her chin and stuck up a tiny middle finger.

"Now, how about some answers?"

"I got nothing to tell!"

"This is your case, so I'll be going about my business." Wolford turned and waved. Judy tilted her head concerned as Wolford left them.

"This is going to spread fast if we don't take care of it." Nick ignored her and kept his focus on the gerbil. he took her from Judy and lead the walk back to their car.

"A distressed male gerbil said his home was broken into. We found his radio and other items smashed in his apartment. Care to explain?" The gerbil tried to resist a smirk, but it was plain on her chubby face.

"Alright. That noisy punk had it coming. I had an important exam a couple of days ago. I fell asleep on the train and missed my stop. It's all his fault!"

"So, bugs, what's your name?" asked Nick.

"Bugs? How dare you! My name is Geliso Wattson." She banged on Nick's paw as he held her. He used his free arm to open the car door.

"Now that you made a confession, we'll be reading you your rights." At least, Nick would have if he remembered the whole procedure.

"You do it, Judy. I always forget the ending half."

"Nick!" The angry glare Judy gave him only made Nick grin. _She'll get over it on the ride back_ , he thought.

* * *

"Ouch!" Nick plucked a few strands of hair from Geliso and placed them in an evidence bag. Judy held the handcuffed gerbil in her paws, not wanting to set her down on the front desk and spread any more of the bugs than they already have.

"No, don't touch her!" shouted Judy as Clawhauser leaned forward to see the now confirmed perpetrator more closely. He sat back and stared with a stupid curiosity.

"This is the cute little home wrecker then." Nick's ears were tickled by Wolford's voice from behind,

"So they say." He whimpered and scratched at his arm. Nick's ears pinned back. He kept wrestling with the thought that they were forgetting something.

"So, I spoke to Bogo. He says he wants to see you two." Nick and Judy looked at him sheepishly. Despite being stationed near rodentia, they knew there was no clearance for larger mammals to enter rodentia or interfere with their affairs.

"Ready for a tongue-lashing?" Judy sighed,

"Let's get it over with." With gloved paws, Clawhauser took an angry Geliso from Judy.

Bogo slowly paced his office with arms resting on his hips. He rolled his eyes and mumbled thoughts to himself.

"I gave one order and you still mess that up. What happened?"

"Actually, it was Judy that entered rodentia." She lowered her head ashamed as Bogo shot her a glance.

"We came across a distressed gerbil outside of rodentia. He begged for our help and we assisted him."

"Not your district. Not your concern." Not their concern, true. But how frustrating. Everything needed approval. Even if it was an act of decency or something reasonable. Protocol always got in the way.

"We have a perp in custody now. She confessed to breaking into a neighbor's home and destroying property," said Judy.

"Don't care. She will be transferred to the proper authorities." Nick bit his lip. Wolford said he spoke to Bogo. But if what he saw earlier was any indication, Wolford came into contact with the bugs as well. He waited and watched for any signs of Bogo being the next victim.

"Chief, though the gerbil lives in rodentia, he did not reach us from inside the district. I spoke with him outside of rodentia."

"That doesn't matter, Wilde! He still lives inside rodentia. Hello?" Judy shook her head at Nick when he turned to her for support.

"It was worth a try. Did Wolford warn you about an infestation?"

"Infestation?" The concern on Bogo's face was enough of an answer.

"The victim of the break-in works in the rainforest. He unwittingly brought bugs with him to the apartment and we think the perpetrator has the bugs as well. We can confirm we have the right gerbil once we check the evidence we collected." Bogo snorted in agitation.

"If you can prove it, we can close this up quick." The wide-eyed stare Nick gave Judy made her ears stand tall.

"What is it, Nick?"

"We forgot to buy the pesticide."

"So the perp, another gerbil, broke into a neighbor's home and caught fleas, is that right?" They nodded to Chief Bogo. He sighed and said, "Okay. I'll order up pest control. And for infesting the department by bringing in a mammal that doesn't belong in our department, half of the cost will come out of both of your checks. Dismissed." Nick grumbled on his way back to the police car, not hearing Judy from behind. Nick was already crunching the numbers in his head. It was going to be a tight two weeks with their pay getting slashed.

"Clawhauser said the test will be confirmed in a half hour. Just enough time for us to get the equipment and come back." Nick whimpered and nibbled on his forearm.

"These things spread so fast."

"Aww, don't worry, foxy. We'll take care of it." He smiled and shook his head, tickled by her stroking the fur on his cheek, pinching it between her fingers and pulling it straight.

They returned to the shopping center near rodentia and dressed in the bug guards by the store. Judy tugged on Nick's arm as they entered.

"We should see about getting some for Mr. Coston as well."

"If we can afford it. The department, us, our car, the victim. Why don't we just buy poison for all of Zootopia?"

"Ey, ah, can I help you?" The familiar droning voice froze Nick's annoyance. He turned to see a shaggy yak behind the counter and smiled in surprise,

"Yax! Hey, what are you doing over here?"

"This is my second gig. The Springs are closed so I help the other employees here. What kind of toxins you need? Killing plants? Bugs?"

"Bugs," said Judy.

"Ah, hey, Jude."

"Yax, did a male gerbil ever come in here today? An itchy one probably?" asked Nick. Yax scratched his chin and sneezed. He wiped his nose on his employee uniform, a gray t-shirt with a dead flower and bug laying side by side.

"Oh you know I can never remember anything. There was a male gerbil here earlier, but I couldn't tell what he looked like. He did have on dirty shoes and pants. And he was itching a lot." Nick smirked, Yax' total lack of self-awareness was a wonder of the world.

"How does he always do that?" asked Judy.

"Give us your best pesticide for fleas and ticks," said Nick. "Make it a dozen cans."

"Ey, you got it, buddy." Yax turned and reached up to the top shelf to grab a canister about as long as his arm, and then he walked out of view to the back through a wooden door. Loud bangs from Yax shuffling items around in the back assaulted Nick's ears. "I hear there's going to be a festival just outside of Zootopia."

"Oh! In Bunnyburrow!" said Judy excitedly.

"Yeah, that's the one. I'll head on up to lead one of the carnival games."

"Hey, leave jobs for the rest of us," said Nick. Judy cozied up to him wrapping her arms around his left.

"Don't worry, Nick. There will be plenty of bunnies to fill the roles there." Nick's ears twitched.

"Is that an invitation?"

"Uh-huh!" He licked her on the top of her nose. She curled her shoulders and squealed, closing her eyes. He smirked and continued to lap at her head, enjoying the softness of her fur.

"Here we are." Yax dropped a rattling container filled with cans onto the countertop. With haste, they paid for the poison and returned to their car. On the drive back, Judy stared at her phone expectantly. A chirp from her phone straightened both of their postures. Nick eagerly listened for the results of the test.

"Alright, they're in."

"Tell me what we already know."

"It's her. The bugs are a match."

"An easy case, no doubt. The cleanup on the other hand..."

"Oh, we're not doing it without Wolford. He didn't take any precautions at all when going through the department knowing that he was infested." Nick grinned.

"Judy, are you saying we should hold an officer hostage to hard labor?"

"Yes, I am."

"Then let's get our guy."


End file.
